Laird MacTavish was a 13 year old registered Thoroughbred we bought when I was sixteen years old. His registered name was Mac’s Texan out of Miss Tex-Ann by McLellan. He was registered with the Jockey Club. My first registered horse! We drove to Fairfield, CT to look at him. His owner was showing him in a hunter division. I wanted a horse I could show in the hunters. He was 16.1 hands, a dark bay with one white sock, a white star and narrow strip. He was a fabulous jumper. I test rode him at a horse show and I was absolutely blown away by his canter. I remember asking my mother if he looked like he was running away with me. She said no, you both looked very comfortable together. I thought she was just being polite. He was the most powerful horse I had ever ridden.

I was absolutely thrilled with Mac. He was good natured and fun to be around. He had a very extensive track record. He toed in with his left front foot and had an old bowed tendon injury. He also stall walked if he was locked in his stall. My father had to make dutch doors in the back of his stall with access to Mac’s pasture. As long as those doors were open, Mac did not stall walk. I was told that after he finished racing, his owner locked him in his stall and did not feed him very much. This is how he acquired his bowed tendon. I learned that horses are like elephants, have a good memory and never forget a bad event. I learned to always train them correctly as it is very difficult to untrain a bad habit and retrain a good habit.

I was very happy hacking Mac and jumping everything I could find along the way to jump. Mac was very happy hacking alone. I was really excited about our first horse show. We went up to Pipestave Hill where I showed all my other animals. I was so proud to be on my new horse and showed everyone. That was until our first class on the flat. We were asked to canter and a horse got to close to Mac’s hind end and he kicked at the other horse narrowly missing him. We were dismissed. I never showed him on the flat again. I also tried to go on trail rides with groups and promptly learned that Mac had to be in the front with a red ribbon on his tail or he would get very hot and strong. Needless to say, Mac was not working out as planned. I was not able to hack him with friends and I was not able to show him on the flat. However, I did not let that bother me one bit. I loved galloping him right out straight. Could he ever fly over the ground! The faster the better for me! I loved to have tears running from my eyes and down my cheeks. He took my breath away.

One summer I worked for a trainer who lived up the street from me. He took in Thoroughbred race horses to recover or start. He also bred Morgans and Thoroughbreds. He let me back the young horses and lunge the race horses. He lunged the race horses on a 100 foot line. He taught me how to do that as well. It was technical and you really had to pay attention. He was older and could not gallop the race horses so he kept them fit for the race track this way. One day I was riding Mac behind this trainers house. We were trotting down a familiar trail, started to canter and jumped over one of our favorite stone walls. Due to the tree line, I did not know my trainer was on the other side lunging one of the Thoroughbreds and neither did Mac. Mac abruptly stopped upon landing on the other side of that stonewall. I immediately went right over his head, did a perfect somersault and landed on my feet standing beside Mac! I will never forget that as long as I live. My trainer asked me if I was alright. I said I was, mounted and went on my merry ride. He had gained control over the Thoroughbred he was lunging so we both continued as though it was all in a days work.

Not long after that I was schooling Mac in an arena near that trainers home. Mac and I were just walking down a hill when he tripped and fell rolling over on my left foot and twisting my knee. I had to walk to the trainers home and tell him. It was awful. I remember hobbling beside Mac. He was so good. It was as if he knew. My trainer kept Mac and drove me home. From there I went to the emergency room and spent the summer in a cast. I learned to ride in it. It was very awkward but I was able to keep on riding. It was actually more difficult to ride after they removed my cast. I had no strength in my ankle and it took the rest of the summer to build up the muscles I had lost while in the cast.

I decided that I wanted to be an event rider. Most of the time we were in the ribbons. Our downfall was the dreaded dressage. I started taking lesson with Pamela Fitzwilliams. She helped me a great deal. Mac was not a very supple horse from his race days. He did have a nice steady rhythm from his hunter days and lovely flying changes. I would get very frustrated and stiff during the dressage work and he would become resistant. I read every book I could find to try to learn and understand dressage. Flat work was boring to me so I did not spend the necessary time it took to really improve a great deal. We managed to go from Novice to Training Level. I loved going to Woodstock,VT and Huntington, VT. Another favorite event of mine was Groton House Farm. Fortunately my mother loved to go and my friend was happy to trailer me where ever I wanted to go. I really enjoyed those days.

I followed the Myopia Hunt on Mac just like all my other animals. Only he really could keep up and jump anything and everything. One day the Master of the Hunt asked me my name. He asked me if I would do some volunteer work at Ledyard Farm. I was so shy but said yes. I had read all about Ledyard Farm in my USCTA magazines. The masters name was Neil R. Ayer. He was so handsome and so nice. I had my license by then and drove to Ledyard as often as I could. I painted stadium jumps and helped build cross country fences. Mrs. Ayer would make us the most tasteful lunches. I was in heaven there. Neil would let me ride his horses as a break from the work. I remember riding On The House. I met General Burton and Jack LeGoff. I was so impressed by these famous men!

I helped fence judge at Ledyard ‘76. What a time of my life this was. I was sweet sixteen and surrounded by beautiful horse flesh and famous people! That was the first CCI event ever held in our area. This event brought people like Princess Anne, Captain Mark Phillips, Bruce Davidson, Tad Coffin and many others. They also filmed International Velvet. I met Tatum O’Neil. The day they were filming the stadium jumping for the movie, it poured buckets. They begged people to stay so the stands would look full in the movie. I remember the beautiful cars people drove and the fabulous parties with delicious food. I thought I had died and gone to heaven!

Then reality set in. I had to get an education and go to college. Mac was older because I had gone to nursing school out of high school but decided that was not for me. I landed a job at a bank as a teller for a few years thanks to a friend. We decided to give Mac away to a good home. The people were wonderful and took excellent care of him. However, I think he died of a broken heart. He loved galloping and jumping and being with me. I hated to part with him. I was closing the chapter of the end of my childhood and opening the new chapter of responsible adulthood. I remember receiving the phone call from the lady that Mac had passed away. I hung up the phone and started sobbing. My mother took one look at me and knew exactly what had happened.

Mac taught me so much. Each horse brought new things to learn. I grew from an innocent child to a teenager over those years. Mac taught me to be bold and brave. I loved hunting him with Myopia. It was the thrill of the chase to be sure. He loved it too! I cried on Mac’s shoulder and face a lot during those years. Over the loss of boyfriends, my parents fights, trying to figure out how I was going to make enough money to enjoy riding and afford to go to the events. Those teenage years were emotional years and Mac was always there for me. He took me from the end of my childhood, from daddy’s little girl to adulthood. He too left me to fend for myself. After his passing, I no longer had that shoulder to cry on or that face to caress and talk to. Mac taught me to be a strong rider and a strong person. He left me to learn how to stand on my own two feet and take care of myself. I cherish those days and memories. He gave me the opportunity to hunt with Myopia, get invited to Ledyard and be a part of something I never thought I would. He was also there for me the day my best friend got married. I rode down her street and waved goodbye to her as the newly weds drove away in their shiny Porsche. She did not know at the time but I sat in Mac’s stall and cried on his face feeding him carrots because I knew that was another chapter of my life closed forever leaving only the sweet memories of our hacks together, the shows together and the Mill Pond swims. I thought she had it made. Little did we know then what our future would bring.